Failure
    I'm a failure. I'm pretty much bad at everything, including the things I'm supposed to be good at, or claim to be. My mom thinks I'm weird, my dad likes me I guess, I'm bad at school, I can't do math, I'm only 5feet tall, I'm forgetful, I walk into things, I can't play guitar. The list is pretty much endless. The good news: failure is relative. I don't have to be a failure in my own eyes just because I am in the eyes of someone else. The other good news: everything is temporary.
    So, supposedly, I'm not too shabby with the poetry. The strange thing about poetry is that someone could classify a poem as horrific, while another person could think its remarkable. It's the beauty of the art world. In order to prove this, here is a poem that I think is pretty smoking hot but you might think is awful. 'One man's trash is another man's treasure' as they say.
 

 Rosie Killed Johnny

There is a white hot sun,

Burning on your left temple

Glistening under the dusty lightbulb,

Above our heads.

I’m crying,

Icicles dripping down steamy cheeks run hot with rage.

‘Stop Yelling’,

Heat hits my face and my ribs are a cage to the beast behind them.

Red Talons,

Scraping tight black cotton and I’m thrown into motion.

Tiny fists,

Clutching to a yellow broom handle.

Hair falls over arms over gritty floorboards and over you-

The fight is gone from your eyes, and ice is setting in mine.

Misplaced Places
I know so many people who love all of these exotic places, like I had this friend who travelled with her family her whole life and then right after she graduated high school, she moved to California and worked on a weed farm and then with the money she made, she packed up with the love of her life and moved to the virgin islands. That's craziness right? I can't believe that she just took off one day and did what she wanted and I feel like not many people do that these days, I feel like life has become a game of pursuing the safest path instead of challenging ourselves. Once I asked her if, out of all of the places she'd been, which was her favorite, and she said she didn't have one.
My favorite place to be is sort of weird, it's in this big white clunky car my best friend has. We take trips out deep into the woods of Gardiner and into the mountains and we listen to music and we can say whatever we'd like, because nobody is there to listen. It also has great speakers and we make playlists just for driving into the mountains. One of the best feelings I've ever had is the hum of the engine beneath my feet, and the wind blowing my hair all over the place, with the perfect song playing in the background. Not to mention, it smells like lavender in there.
 I'm also one of those people who believes that a place is just a place until you give it meaning. I don't care if I set foot in a fairy garden with rainbows shooting out of my eyeballs, places don't gain importance for being beautiful, they gain importance by being significant to you or your life in some way. It's all about function: if you kissed the love of your life for the first time in front of a junkyard, is that junkyard going to be more important to you than the random nice field a few houses down? That's for you to decide.

MALENA
As a kid, my family was really religious and as a result, so was I. I was really lonely as my parent's only child and more than anything I wanted siblings, a whole bunch of siblings. I had to be about three at this point and, I don't have any real memories before this era of my life. Each night when I would say my prayers, I would ask God for a brother and a sister because I was so alone in my house with my mom. We had this old rocking chair, that was constantly breaking, and one Christmas morning I got up before my parents to see what Santa had left me but, when I saw the presents nestled under the tree, I was overcome with sadness. I realized I had nobody to share my presents with. It was snowing outside and I didn't want to wake my parents up quite yet because I didn't want to ruin their Christmas with my crying. Instead I decided to let out one last plea in the form of a prayer. I crawled behind the old rocker and began praying and praying for a brother and sister but, it felt futile. I dried my tears, and woke up my parents. They were in a great mood and we all cooked breakfast together, bacon and eggs, and opened presents. I got a purple bike from Santa and some clothes from my Nana, my mom and dad got me a bunch of cool fairy dolls. My mom was acting sort of strange, and she said that she needed to tell me something before my Nana came over. I was worried, was dad sick? Was mom sick? My mom asked me to sit down, and she assured me that whatever happened she would always love me the same way she did at that moment and my dad told me that I needed to understand the way love worked. He said that it was endless, and that never did it have to be taken from one person to give to the next. What were they talking about? I was confused and finally my mom told me "You're getting a baby sister." I was so happy I started crying and even now, I remember the day she came home from the hospital. She was the smallest thing I'd ever seen and I loved her to bits from that moment on. That Christmas I went to bed really early because of how early I had woken up. I had this dream where I spoke to this giant whale had the entire earth growing off of his back and he told me that my sister, was my responsibility now and that I had to take care of her. He said there would be times when I had to be her mom and asked me if I could do it. I knew I could and at the end of the dream, the whale picked  me  up and put me on his back, and then I woke up. I remember this like it was yesterday and to this day, when I see my sister doing something stupid or dangerous, I hear the big blue whale's voice in my head. Since then, I've changed my opinions on religion and giant blue whales and grown up quite a bit but it doesn't change the fact that I ended up with an awesome little sister with crazy blonde hair to contrast my crazy black hair; Malena and Giannina till the end lil mimp.